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October 9th, 2005

It’s late morning on a Sunday and I’m sitting cross-legged on the short, stiff almost industrial carpet of the sun room add-on. I’ve got my shirt off. I’m taking notes on a how-to book I’m reading. Death Cab For Cutie’s painfully articulate indie pop jangles in the perimeter. And then I cough, too suddenly to put down the pen and notebook in my hand to cover my mouth, and just as suddenly, I have a wormy chunk of sputum on my wrist. I look closely at it and see the black speckles suspended in the clear viscosity. And I grin real big. “My lungs are getting clean!” I say outloud to myself, feeling a comensurate happiness come over me.

If we jump in and change an action without changing the beliefs that have produced it, the performance of the new action will diminish over time because it has no foundation to support it.

– Jill H. Podjasek, M.S., R.N. with Jennifer Carney (from their sample book proposal contained in Write the Perfect Book Proposal by Jeff Herman and Deborah Levine Herman.

This is what my self-imposed South Carolinian bootcamp is all about, making the shift from telling myself that I shouldn’t smoke crack to telling myself how fun it is to have lungs colored right.

Now it’s Mos Def’s The New Danger album that’s squeejin’ out my laptop. Danger has been a longtime nickname of mine. This is the new danger you’re looking at. Most definitely.

Entry Filed under: Lifin